emo emo emo

bad mood from yesterday.
still in a terrible mood.
maybe its all the moody songs i have been listening to.
SONGS CAN reAlly affect youR MOOD.
maybe i am really a SADIST.
haix.
i pity my sister.
cos i was in a bad mood.
so i started scolding her for every single move she makes.
i am a bad jie jie lar.
and she is like my 'chu qi tong'[venting anger person]
i think the translation is something like that lar.
and once i start scolding, i can keep on scolding until i lock myself in the room.
dont worry, i dont scold everyone and anyone.
maybe only curse the person behind her back.
you pple should know who are the 2 pple i always curse.
ok that is so mean of me.

guitar is really turf.
at last i have persuaded my kor to teach me.
and i am having a really hard time.
cos i am learning a right-hande guitar.
kor suggested me to go get a left-handed guitar and learn from a left-hander from church.
things would be easier for me.
but. i thot of learning the right-handed guitar instead.
same for drums.
havent seen someone teaching drums for left-handers.
so haf to learn the right-handers way.
super irrtating.
i just hate it!!! hating all this right left handed issue.
even piano!!!
cos i am a left hander, so my left hand tends to play louder than my right hand.
and the right thing is, right hand is suppose to sound louder.
WADEVA.
why must left handers always to things the right handed way?
why must left handers learn how to use right handed things?
why must everything be created for right hand use?
even the mouse is on the right!!
the door knob is meant for right handers, the tolist bolw flush, books...
EVERY SINGLE THING IS MEANT FOR RIGHT HANDERS!!!.
this world is totally unfair.
you may say almost everything is made for the right handers cos the majority are right hander.
but still, they should some things on the left..
is either i am hate this world or am i just hating myself?
why must i be the one that is left handed?
why must i be the one with ultra big head?
why?!?!
why am i the sadist of the world?
i really dunno.
i am not blaming god for making me like that.
i am blaming MYSELF for being like that.
the day i was born, if i started using my right hand and grab things, things will be different now.
the day i was born before i was born, if i prayed really hard to god for a smaller head, things will be different.
cos if i had a smaller head.
i could fit nicely into those caps and visors, dun have to special make my specs, could cut my hair any way i wanted it to be, could fit nicely into those hairbands.
once and for all, i hate myself for being doreen.

now i should talk about other things on a lighter mood.
i have been doing for my mum this handphone pouch.
HAND-MADE from scratch.
no sewing machine.
you may be thinking,'why not just buy one?'
but i think pple will treasure things better if you made it all on your own.
i shall go and continue reading my dictionary and start reading the BIBLE!!!