me

Monday, June 26, 2006

LIAN AI DA REN
DOREEN:BOY
ANGELA:GIRL
JO AND SQUEAK:BACK UP

DOREEN: green shirt
black outer guy shirt
baggy jeans
leather black shoes
I DID IT:)
smiles to me:)
yeah. i cant believe that i actually REMEMBERED all my lyrics.
CHINESE SINGING COMPETITION wasnt that bad after all:)
a heavy burden lifted from me at least.


thankyou note to:
RACHEL, for the encouragement and flowers
FAITH, for the encouragement and flowers
GENIA, for the encouragement and flowers
ER KOR!! for lending me his black top which i took so long to beg him for it
DA KOR!! for leanding me the leather black shoes. actually i didnt even ask him for permission. just stolen it.. but still THANK YOU:)


JOANNE, ANGELA, SQUEAK DARLING:)
thanks for making all these possible.
if today did screw up, i will hate myself for the rest of my life and never go on stage and sing ever again..but IT DIDNT:)
speaking the truth, this competition for myself but not to the extent of buying a brand new leather shoe:)
at least now i can daring tell myself that i can achieve all these and my dream is not plainly just a dream that i cannot achieve:)


SORRY-s to:
SQUEAK: i didnt mean to pull you up on stage and sing chinese song with me. thou you didnt didnt wanna go on stage, but i am still really glad you still learn a brand new chinese song that you can sing now. i am really sorry if the song is still stuck in your head. you can ask me to teach you another chinese song:)
LYDIA TAN:dear, i am so sorry that you cant see the performance. i am still [really] feeling very guilty about it. i should have just sew angela's mouth up and ask her not to say your name for the translating competition.. I PROMISE I WILL SING ANY SONG YOU WANT ME TO SING TO YOU!! even though i know that cant make up to the loss of not watching the performance, that is the best i can do...okay?


feeling weird apologising to 2 lydia-s in a row.HA!
i still feel so stressed up even after the burden is off my shoulders.
i got to study A maths test tmr and i dont even got any clue what on earth are they testing..
i still got E maths hw...SIGHX!!


i realised that i didnt complete my june hols plan.

THINGS TO DO DURING JUNE HOLS

OBS

intercamp

class party

shopping with cousins

stayover at granny/cousins' hse

worship practice 8 june

church camp 19-22 june

agm handover meeting 19 june

date with huiyu

cg every friday at barker methodist

caps ball at toa payoh at sats

date with squeak:) 9 june

all my homework(chi,e maths,a maths,heymaths,chem)<br>
catch up with my work in school

date with US to SENTOSA 15 june

chalet with sunday school[sec3+4] 15-16june




look. plus i didnt shop enough
havent watch SHE's THE MAN, JUST MY LUCK, RUNAWAY VACATION
can someone pls go with me to catch all these movie???
i know the whole world alr watched she's the man w/o me...
WE MUST GO TO SENTOSA TOGETHER CLIQUE:)
AND KBOX/PARTY WORLD:)


watched all jolin's new MVs yesterday.
i really feel like dancing.
ANYONE KEEN IN TAKING DANCING COURSES WITH ME???
i wanna learn pop dance badly..


that day i saw this course that people can attend before becoming singers.
they teach you how to sing and dance.
maybe i should go there for my dance and singing classes then:)
oh. and they also tell you what are the responsibilties as an celebrity and all..
maybe its really a good course for me.
a new activity up for my post o level activities..
thou i only take my Os next year..HA!


your faithfulness always follows me.
i am so glad you made everything straight and possible for me.
is this the route i am suppose to take?
show me your way cos i wanna live a life with you in it.
what to do in the future?
guide me.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

last and this week, received 3 belated prezzie:)
a skirt
a shirt
and a bead bag for my phone..its so CUTE:)


so excited and nervous for tomorrow
not only cos school is reopening and i havent done any hw,
its cos of the chinese week thingy tmr.
heard that we are having chapel in chinese... CANT WAIT:)
it will be such a pleasure hearing MGirls singing in chinese thou everyone hates it
CHINESE SINGING COMPETITION:GROUP
yeah.. i am in it.
with angela, joanne, emma and squeak.
26 june is here at last.
but somehow i wish it would never come.
i am so nervous.
but i am so glad that people in my clique do anticipate my performance:)
you guys are so sweet!
ESPECIALLY EUGENIA KEK!!!
my loyal fan:)
she called me specially to ask me what time is the competition starting and ending.
hope she didnt really go and do boards for me.
i will be so embarrassed..
FAITH tag was nice and encouraging enough for me.
enough to push me up the stage and sing my best:)
thanks:)
TRINA asking me how long my song will be..


i am so excited over my dressing tmr:)
sighx..
i hope the rap part of the song will turn out good.
hope i will remember the lyrics and be brave enough on stage
i have stage fright...actually quite bad stage fright.
and i am not going to only sing, rap as well..
hope GOD will just take everything away tmr and i will present my best.


i hope my voice will turn out well.
cos i am having quite a bad sore throat now..
i am so scared that i will ruin everything tmr...
I NEED ENCOURAGEMENT PPLE!!!

Saturday, June 24, 2006

i thought that i already abandon the SLEEPING PRO title since now i am able to wake up at 7/8 even when i sleep at 12/1
but i think its IN THE BLOOD
the day after camp, i slept for a 13 hrs without interruption.
today, 12 hours..
if i am going to comtinue like that, i am bound to sleep during class.
can i just run away and not go school?
how i wish. but this will never come true.
even if my dad was the MOE.
sighx people.

went squeak's place today for the chinese singing thingy.
i so think we are going to screw everything up
and i really dont feel like going to school on monday for the competition after all.
i dont even want anyone to appear there.
at least not so embarrassed even if everything goes really awful.
I STILL SERIOUSLY DONT THINK WE SHOULD DO LIAN AI DA REN
i rather a song from bands and stuff
but SHE songs are really diffcult to sing i know..
i dont even know how i am going to act like a guy when i dont even look like one??
but i still anticipate for everything to happen:)
soon enough, jo and angela leave for JJlin's concert and dont know where.
left me and squeak all there by ourselves, our moment together:)
then SQUEAK started to read me 2 pages long letter i wrote/typed this morning.
she took like almost 3 mins and she is done.
WHY DID YOU CALL YOURSELF THE FISHBALL? squeak asked.
i dont know.
to me, only fishball,BLUE and watermelon is the close-est thing i would call myself.
we had out private talk all the way until 5:)
almost 2 hours of peace from everything in the world.


i miss church camp
i miss having breakfast with everyone and hit yian ping
then tease huiyu
have retarded catfights with bonnie.
talking about how niunai can get with joanne
doing the retard clappings with bao gang
and LAUGHING at chaoyi's weirdness.


i still miss obs
kayaking like you never get to see the end line.
eating the same food forever
get to see salty sandy watermelon at the beach and get so pissed off at whoever that abandon that DARLING watermelon
PLUS I CAN GET TO SEE RACHEL EVERYDAY!!
start complaining with her and start talking about all the yummy food.
then we will start thinking of ways to not do an activity
then comes lydiaTAN WHO KEEP ON SAYING HOW FAT SHE IS WHEN SHE IS ONLY 39 KG and how ugly her tan is which made her look more like a normal person
MILDRED will start acting mad and gets madly in love with ME:)
and cassandra[zhou jie] will start limping around and go siao with me with the zhou jie zhou mei rap.
not too far away, we can see davina giving me the werid stares...she will thinking how she doesnt wanna get near doreen at all.
will be able to find lydia agreeing with her.
then SQUEAK comes along really jealous and tries to push cassies away cos SQUEAK is getting so jealous as she want me to help her find invinicible rock king who is hidden in pula ubin.
ANGELA will be then heard first even before we can see her..
she will yell and scream at everything


can we pls turn time back?
an experience like never before.


the feeling is getting stronger now.
i am like pushing it away from me
i cannot take the fact that everything is so coincidental
why?
tell me if the feeling is right or not.
so i know that i would not have such a hard getting over it.


now i feel why jasper means when there will be a point of time where you cannot stop praying.
for me is, i cant stop praising and worshipping him
is that a good sign of improvement as a christian?
GOD, show me the way
and i will go

Friday, June 23, 2006

just return for church camp.
THE EARLY TIMES
all about the old testament.
19-22 june:)
my group: JOB
group members: clement, maylin, joanne, kailing, daniel, suzanne, ME:)
clement, 1st time as leader.
but still did a great job.
i LOVE MY GROUP
though we are a bit not enthu at times..:)


the camp was a really worth going camp.
i am so glad that i did go and not follow what my head told me.
MY GOAL HAVE BEEN ACHIEVED FOR THIS CAMP.
TO ENCOUNTER GOD:)


gina, no worries.
you did ALRIGHT as a camp committee:)


love my BAO BAO (chinese bun) gang made during the camp.
huiyu - 'chou' bao [ smelly bao]
ME - 'lan bao' [lousy bao]
yian ping - 'cheng bao' [orange bao]
bonnie - 'you zha bao' [you know those long stuff you eat with soya bean milk? yeah. its you zha/ you tiao. i made this name up.. trust me. you cant find a you zha bao outside:)]


yeah...BAOBAOBAO:)


i will be more active in church after this camp and mixing around with everyone.
hopefully.


and CLOSER TO GOD:)


i felt your presence just behind me that night, father.
your 3 thunders in that clear night sky tells me everything.
i see no rain, but i feel your presence deep within
i finally know what it means by ASK AND YOU SHALL BE GIVEN:)
i asked for an encounter with you for this camp once again to bring close to you again
and i see your faithfulness to me
i must put my faith in you like how JOB did:)
teach me to read your WORD and pray like never before.


after that night stucture experience in the camp, i worshipped the LORD all by myself for an 1 1/2 hour.
on the keyboard and with my voice.
i must praise the LORD, spread the GOSPEL and PRAY like never before.
i am happy that i opened up to not only to my group in the camp, i opened up all i am to GOD


nothing is possible with GOD:)

i did this really long ago.
but decided to post it up now:)
PEOPLE NEED FRIENDS:)
so love your friends XD


Doreen, you should pick your Supportive Sidekick
You know who we're talking about — the champion consoler, the person you can always count on, the person who knows how to clean up even after the biggest emotional superspill of your life. This friend gives you a one-on-one rush like no other. This confidante for all seasons can probably even read your mind just a little. Or don't you remember the last time they finished a sentence for you?Lucky for you, your supportive sidekick can probably guess what your next dreams will be before you even do. It must be nice to know you have a tireless supporter and coach in your midst, someone you can tell anything to who always has your best interests in mind and a smile to cheer you up. How sweet!

Saturday, June 17, 2006

i hate people who have to poke their finger into matters that dont even involve them a single bit.
dont think once you ask me to do something, means i got to do it for you.

i am not a pushover.
i cannot change along to your mood and decision alright.
and once i see very clearly of my stand again,
DONT TRUST ANYONE. EVEN THOSE WHO YOU KNOW FOR LONGEST TIME.

having this 'i dont know who to trust' feeling, its not my fault.
you gave it to me.
it all started with you.

after i found out, during my childhood days, what i wanted so badly was taken away from me at the age of 2, i know that with or without me in this world, everyone will be just fine.
i am just an extra waste who is adding on weight onto this poor planet.

i took you as a sister and hearing all these truths that you never will get to hear, i have to both take the pain and remember not to mention it to anyone.
cos thats my promise to the person who told me about it.
though i dont trust anyone, doesnt mean i dont want pple to trust me.
at least i know that others have me to trust.

*note: this whole entry is not to the same person.. i am not that mean to type a whole entry on someone.

sometimes my resentment, hatred, anger just gotta get over my head..
i have to tell someone how bad is it to have to bear this secret to myself for 2 whole years..
yes, all to myself.

i would like to thank SQUEAK
not cos we are les partners or anything naughty.
i would like to thank her as being my that friend always beside me, always supporting me.
i am so glad that i got my phone from my parents at the right time.
the time when GOD sent me a real friend that i know will last.

TO SQUEAK:
i am really glad you reply my sms and send me meaningful messages.
everytime i read a sms from you, it lightens up my whole day.

i really look forward to receive that letter from you
i am dying to tell you so many things i been thru
i really like to thank GOD for you, for allowing us to be in the same school and same class this year.
i wanna thank GOD that we can be in the same OBS group and got to know each other better.
i thank GOD that you just stay 2 stops away from me.
i thank GOD that you are in barker methodist cell.
i thank GOD for making you, you.
in your brokeness, complete.
in your brokeness, i place you as my complete bestfriend in my heart.
thank you.
and i seriously wanna tell you, I LOVE YOU:)

TO HUIYU:
i really wanna thank GOD for such a great senior/big sister like you.
you have always that person who is there to question me about my spiritual life.
you always that nice person i know i must treasure.
even though we dont get to see each other as often as we do in the past, but i know we are still able to open up to each other and just go out like we have know each other for forever.
yeah.
and i really appreaciate everything you have done for me, that include remembering to write my little blue book that only belongs to us, and remembering that you have a little sister to take care of in YM.

TO RACHEL:
i thank GOD for you always around to listen to my 'love' stories.
that include cool-sh and all lesbianic talks..
thank GOD for you always going to the flea market with me.
thank GOD for allowing you to have all the patience to listen to me talk rubbish and stand all my nonsense.
thank GOD that you are such a sleeper-lover so you didnt blame me too badly about kicking you in the night during OBS.
thank GOD for you just trying to be yourself

GOD, can you hear my cry in the night?
see my tears in the day?
sense my troubles in my life?
in my corner, i cry, kneel before you and shout
I NEED YOU, FATHER.
can you hear me?

Friday, June 16, 2006

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR EUGENIA:)
yeah. stay happy and funky always ya...
LOVE YA LOT;)

Thursday, June 15, 2006

woke up early and got to rush out of the hse to go to my aunt's place.
yeah.
second day in a row rushing out of the house after i wake up..
its so bad for my health...i think:)
i AM SO HAPPY THAT I CAN STAY IN MY AUNT"S PLACE:)
since i cant go anywhere, its fun staying here right.
but i still gotta complete my hw here at the same time...
sighx...
HW IS SUCH A KILLER.
reading 42 chinese stories and doing so many maths question...DIE!!
and i only finished 9 stories and 20 maths question...sigh.

I DONT WANT GO BACK TO SCHOOL.
homework is such a chore.
i want to go back to meet my friends and not my teachers and my testbook and hw...ARhhhhh

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

jump out of bed at 8.52am cos i was suppose to wake up at 8 to get ready to go emma's place for practice.
lucky i still managed to reach there in time:)
we are sticking to sing lian ai da ren.
i am having great difficulty memorising it..
cos words in the chorus is not consistant after ever verse.
it like have different words.
cos lian ai da ren is a guy-girl singing to each other.
the best part about the song is, i am SINGING THE GUY part all by myself..
i dont mind and actually rather.
but thinking about singing the wrong words and having to 'flirt' with angela and jo on stage PLUS i am stage fright (which everyone is so surprised about).
i do.
i am afraid that it will affect me singing in tune, harmonising, remember the words in my head, and all those little flirty acts i gotta do on stage..


these are some juicy DETAILS why you should stay back after school to watch my performance:) (ego..HA!)
1. DOREEN WILL BE SINGING ON STAGE
2. NO TICKETS NEEDED FOR THIS FREE PERFORMANCE WHICH CANNOT BE MISSED.
3. DOREEN WILL BE FLIRTING WITH GIRLS ON STAGE
4.DOREEN WILL BE DRESSED LIKE A GUY(hot or not? decide it for yourself)


TO MY CLIQUE!!!
pls come and watch.
i need your support.
cos i have stage fright(as mentioned about), so its better to have some familar faces in the crowd/audience so my eyes got someone to place.
REMEMBER TO TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE SITTING:)
genia, do those boards...HA! i am joking.


SINGING COMPETITION 26 june06 monday after school:)


i look at you,
amazed at how fast you put the past behind you and walk ahead.
pls tell me when you feel tied up by everything and have no one to tell everything to.
pls tell me you are just putting all those things away from your view.
for me, it have been 1year 5 months 28days
and i still feel that everything just happened yesterday.
just let me know when you need a listening ear:)

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

today, did some chinese homework in the morning.
i just realised that i got to read 42 stories for chinese test when school reopen and i am only on story no.8
which is FAR from 42...
yeah.
did my chinese compo 1/2 way.
will complete it later.

went out with huiyu to orchard today.
SUBWAY ROCKS:)
yeah.
they should change the packaging for their cookies.
they make my whole bag smell like cookies again..this is the 2nd time on the same bag...diao
we walked from far east, to wisma, and to taka.
and the best thing was, we didnt even buy ANYTHING:)
though we went into about 30 shops.
yeah.
haha.
2 brokers going to orchard...
moreover, GSS is not even helping us at all.
everything is STILL SO EX.

back to the gunbound craze recently.
i am SO PISSEd that i cannot remember my pw and have to restart all over again FROM CHICK.
yeah.
gunbound is more cool than maple ok.
cos little pple plays it now:)

going for chinese singing group practice tmr.
only staying for 2 hours.
hope the time will be FRUITFUL:)

putting the past behind me and only look to the future.
this is the best way to live life and continue to walk in the light.
strangers who are so close...

Sunday, June 11, 2006

today, mood a little better:)
cousins coming to stayover
hope i still will be able to do my work :S


no mood to update anything.
today is somehow boring to think of it.
everything is like... DEAD

Saturday, June 10, 2006

BOO

yesterday, went to squeak's place to supposely have our little date but her old neighbour came back and visit her and she was so getting in the way.
she is really cute and lively but i thought getting everything talked out was more important.
got squeak
-a box of honey stars
-a bottle of coffee with korean words on it(she was getting so high on the korean words)
-a eclaire
-a packet of kisses chocolate
-a bottle with a love note in it:)
for her birthday present
yeah.
I WROTE MY 1ST 3 KOREAN WORDS ON HER BOTTLE!!
and i got it all right:)
i just have the korean blood in me:)
sorry, i get too high when anything related to korea is mentioned
like my mum going to korean in a month's time w/o me for a WHOLE week.

after that we went for cell and i insisted on not going for the worship before cell cos i feel really uncomfortable going there.
maybe too many unknown faces.
TO SQUEAK, YOUR COOKIES ROCKS
though i am suppose to eat behind your back, but WHO CARES!?
back to cell, i was FUN listening to emma-ma's crap and squeak talking sense into emma.
i was glad, lucky that my parents didnt call me and ask me to go home during cell when it ended at 1030pm.
squeak's mum send me home:)
oh ya.
SQUEAK:)!!!, YOUR MUM IS SO CUTE:)
maybe every korean is just so cute and lovable
i am more used to the people there now as i am being to talk more
i PROMISE TO BE MORE SOCIALABLE IN CHURCH
though i enjoy being dao and only will be dao in church
maybe cos of all those things that happened to me when i wasnt dao in church.

went for caps ball in church
before the game, i was glad that i finally felt and had the time to come for caps ball
during the game and when the rain came, i hate myself for choosing the wrong day to come
pinpointing no one, i didnt even touch the ball in the WHOLE game.
was running around like an IDOIT
i will just say that i am TOO short to comfort myself.
for the weather,
maybe GOD didnt want me to go for the game?
maybe GOD wanted me to spent more time with my sister?
maybe GOD wanted me to stay at home and do my homework and sleep?
maybe i was meant to be an weekend loser.

HUIYU: sorry for the really lousy attitude in church today; this was what all went thru my mind. i am just annoyed with church

i dont know how i am going to survive 4 days 4 nights of loneliness
persuaded mummy, but still forced to go for camp
not that excited anymore

THANK GOD FOR SCHOOL FRIENDS:)
THANK GOD FOR RACHEL AND FAITH:)
THANK GOD FOR ORCHARD:)
i had something to look forward to the whole day.
to get to see rachel and faith and get into orchard after a month of staying in my stupid shell.
WE WENT TO FLEA MARKET ONCE AGAIN
our usual hangout between the 3 of us.
i LOVE THIS WEEK's flea market...ROCKS:)
when i spent $$ in a flea market, it means its GOOD:)
i was glad for the rain, cos all prices went DOWN
then, we walked around town, popping into shops that sells really ex clothing which we will just wanna PUKE when you realise its the great singapore sales and the prices are still CRAZYly expensive.

maybe i rely too much on my school friends, ending up, too afraid too graduate.
i used to CANT WAIT TO GRADUATE FROM MG.
now i rather let time pull 10000000000000000000 times longer.
the end line is DONT PUT YOUR TRUST AND HOPES ON ANYTHING INCLUDING YOURSELF
i seriously think that once i hit into JC, i will just drop all my hair and die of stress.
or i will never see myself graduating from there.

at the bottom of that bottom line here, I AM A LOSER, totally

Thursday, June 08, 2006

confused now.
who is who?
now i cant even feel that feeling anymore.
where did it vanish to?
was i just lying to myself the whole time about you?
to distract the pain to go away?

i totally agree with the chinese saying that the furthest distance is not literally far away from each other, its that i am beside you and yet you dont even know that i love you.

its that show that swing my whole mood 180 degree around.
i always watch tv shows and put myself into one of the characters as well.
绿光森林 Green Forest, My Home
even though its a idol drama, but i must say that it puts alot of thinking and feeling in you.
its like, you will feel like crying for the characters after the show.
i guess that was where my mood swing came about...
TMR IS FRIDAY so i shall be happy and not be so moody.
there is such thing as a prince in this world.

I AM SHAKING NOW
my mum's car just got bang by this under age male driver.
i witness the bang.
thats why i am still shivering away.
lucky no one's hurt.
if not, i will be shaking even more


do i still feel for you like i use to do?
or is everything just an illusion?
too late for turning back now.

haix.

crap. i am like waking up at 8am every morning now and its like the hols lar.
the latest i woke up is like ... 9am
ARHH!!
and i sleep like at 12? Sh*t.

for church camp, i am going late on the 1st day.
around dinner time.
so if you guys dont see me at 8am at church with my bros, pls dont freak out:)
i got GB meeting which is really important as we will me electing/voting for our future leaders and we have a leadership training after that.
if i dont successfully become any leader, maybe i will go much earlier for camp:)
see first

I REALLY DONT WANNA PAY FOR THE EXTRA CASH FOR INTER CAMP:(
i am like how broke alr and tell me to pay $$ that is not even my fault, i feel so ...arghhhh

today, gotta go down to school at like 12.30pm to get all my books to my mum's car.
i havent even started doing anything in these past 2 weeks of hols cos i left all my BOOKS AND PENCIL BOX in school.
yeah. and my HOMEWORK LIST!!
i have to rush all my work in ONE WEEK:(

i got a shock this morning when i see so many pple tagging my c-box.
and i gotta reply so many.
I AM SO HAPPY THAT SQUEAK TAGGED:)
and pet,vera and rachel.
you guys only tag in a blue moon.
not say i always go and tag you guys, its just that I FEEL HAPPY:)

HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY SQUEAK DEAR!!!
dont tell me that i have good timing.
you are just making me feel guilty.
SQUEAK's birthday is like on 3rd june and i only found like yesterday which is the 7th june.
i am late by 4 days...crap.
and she says i have good timing....DONT TELL ME THAT:(

i have decided what to get for SQUEAK for her/his birthday:)
SQUEAK is a her/his cos she/he is not really sure what gender she/he is:)
you know, lesbians have a hard time telling what gender they are...LIKE ME
i have finish doing her card and i just realised that i still own trina a card...
but it will be really werid giving to her now...
i see if i can do it in time before next friday.
plus genia's card.
I ALREADY GOT SOMETHING FOR GENIA, trina.
shared with lydia.
pls dont get angry, cos we got for her what we got for you but in a different colour:P

in the mids discussing for what we will do for the chinese singing competition
EMMA; ANGELA; ELIEEN; JOANNE; SQUEAK; DOREEN:)
yeah. cant wait for our 1st practice which is i also dont know when.

everyone is excited for THIS FRIDAY:)
fine. maybe its just ME and SQUEAK
but WHO CARES
ME + SQUEAK = everybody
got it?
HA!

i am so stucked to ENGLISH songs now.
its all isador's and isabel's fault.
every morning i wake up, the 1st thing i think is COFFEE and COMPUTER
the 1st web i go is RADIO.BLOG.CLUB
listen to JOJO and KELLY CLARKSON:)
but i am (duh) loyal to my asian songs.
chinese, jap and KOREAN songs still rock:)

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

ARHHHhhh!!:)

XIANG SAID THAT I LOOK LIKE BOA!!!
woot.
that means...
I LOOK LIKE A KOREAN:)
yeah.
i am so JEALOUS that squeak is a korean.
dont know if she is proud of it.
but if i am a korean, I WILL BE SO PROUD AND TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IT.
sorry, its not that i dont enjoy being a chinese/singaporean,but...
I LOVE KOREA AND BEING A KOREAN:)
maybe thats why i am with squeak...
no no no. i cant be with someone cos he/she is a korean:)
BUT I STILL LOVE HER KOREAN OR NOT:)

XIANG ROCKS!!!
cos he said look like a KOREAN!!!
THANKS! you brighten up my moody day by tagging that on MY blog:)

i just heard from RA that we dont have to go for PBB
means i can go FULL TIME for church camp:)

i am such an idoit
i love you no more
i pity him.
at such a young age, almost abandoned.
just like that girl.

I HATE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE!!!
clear enough?
all thanks to you now i am who i am.
GET AWAY..

Monday, June 05, 2006

WOOT

went to J8 like for almost 5 hrs with my cousins:)
yeah.
got a brown top which is really pretty
and a really nice shades at a really reasonable price:)
love it so much<3
the great singapore sales everywhere is getting crazy

REALLY LOVE MY SHADES AND TOP
ok. getting really high.
i am so broke for the hols ok.
lucky i still get allowance this hols
all thanks to my really buzy schedule
is it spelt like that? HACK!

i just realised that other than the 4 camps mentioned just now
-OBS over
-intercamp over
-class party over
-shopping with cousins over
-stayover at granny/cousins' hse now
- worship practice 8 june
-church camp 19-22 june
-date with huiyu to the beach
-cg every friday at barker methodist
-caps ball at toa payoh at sats
-date with squeak:) 9 june
-all my homework (chinese,maths,chemistry)
-catch up with my work in school
-date with US (genia,faith,rachel,trina,vera)w/o raina cos she is in china now:( 9 june
-stayover at vera's house

i am really getting MAD
sighx.
this means no more shopping for this hols.
i am not intending to spent anymore $$$ cos i am not working...DAMN!

Sunday, June 04, 2006

i am SO BORED NOW:(
yeah.
in my cousin's house
TO ALL GB SEC3 pple: i know who is that freak who went around tagging our blogs with all those ____LOVER notes...
to that person(i shall be nice and not put your name here, be tHANKFUL) : STOP ALL NONSENSE PLS!! you are just plainly CHILDISH. yes. get off our back and stop pranking. its really mean of you:/

yeah. enough of scolding those BO LIAO pple:)
i got a new c-box.
LOVE IT, thou it look a little werid on my blog.

got LOTS of thing to do in this hols
tons of maths hw, studies to catch up on, camps to go...ARH!
sick of camps now...i have like 4 in this june hols..
OBS, intercamp, church camp...
HATE CAMPS.

enough of rubbish here.
BLAHh...hate this hols:(
i am suppose to work..and now, i dont even have the time to find job:(((((

Saturday, June 03, 2006

GB INTERCAMP:)

JUST CAME BACK FROM ESTHERFEZ
won a sliver for multimedia
me and trina did all the editing which is actually quite FUN:)
no doubts about being a creative director now:)
and i love taking videos and photos:)
results for photo/video competition is not out yet:(

i am so sorry, kendra.
i lost my voice, had gb in the morning and just came back from gb camp thats why my mummy dont allow me to go for caps ball.
sorry for the consistant breaking promise about caps ball:/

BACK FROM INTER-CAMP YESTERDAY
it was alright.
lucky i was quite occupied with worship practices, supp classes and multimedia during the camp.
so i didnt have to face the kids much:)
sorry, cos generally i just DONT LIKE KIDS!!!!
yeah. and i MISSING SQUEAK THE WHOLE TIME IN CAMP
and angela was really worried about me and squeak turning lesbian...as in, real lesbians..
but dont have to worry angie, me and squeak will CONTROL:) HA!
i am so happy that i was really open in the GB camp and i really had a nice time bonding with the sec3s
now i know everyone much better.
AMANDA ANG laughs at everything i say and do.. just like hannah.
AM I THAT FUNNY???HA!

CHINESE SINGING COMPETITION 260606
i am doing group item. not solo anymore
angela, i think i am fine doing with lian ai da ren/hey you.
i dont mind being girl or boy:)
but i think we should do another song.
so emma can play it on the guitar for us.
and pls include SQUEAK:)

MY MUMMY ALLOW ME TO GO TO CG AT BARKER:)
not for the guys, pls.
not interested at all.
its an ALL GIRL CG PLS
and its GOOD, pple there are really nice:)

today i had to go bishan MRT by myself and it takes me 1 hr to get there.
so on the bus, i was thinking about what i have been told about someone.
i am really sorry that something similar that happened to me, happened on you too.
i thot i would be the only one meething this kind of thing.
in the same year, we get hurt for the same issue.
i really mean what i said on the sms the other day.
i realised that you are not just another friend of mine, you are more than a friend to me
and i am sure our friendship will be strong.
i am happy that you would like to be truthful to me when i told you that i decided to be truthful to you as well.
i was really glad that you didnt just admit that it happened, but willingly to talk to me about it.
you know why?
i never told anyone how bad mine was last year.
at least you had the courage to talk to someone, i didnt.
i am really HAPPY that you dont mind talking about it.
if i end up crying, sorry.
if you end up sobbing away, i am really sorry to bring all those memories back to you again.
i just wanted you to feel better and get over it once and for all.
and hopefully, the talk will do good to me as well.
i dont wanna see anyone around me getting hurt.. dont bother about how bad the talk will have side effects on me. i dont care.
thank you for being so open:)
love you always.

class party was very unexpected.
pple who went for the party, PLS STOP SPREADING AROUND WHATEVER HAPPENED PLS!!
those who didnt go but know what happened, PLS DONT SPREAD!

i just gotta protect my friend from getting hurt even more.
that night after the party, rahcel sent faith home.
somehow, i just feel that strong friendship between me and faith.
i cant just leave her behind, i stayed on with her until 11++ pm.
we were in the playground, she was talking to her friends on the phone while i star-gaze and think of how i would react in faith's shoes.
its a really important point of time to have a good friend of yours to be by your side
i am still really glad i stayed on:)
FAITH, our friendship was set on the test. i am really sure that YOU are one friend i treasure alot and WILL MISS YOU when i leave mg and go on to poly, where no one goes.

thinking about how time flies, like its already june n0w and 1 1/2 yrs more to O levels:(
i dont really bother about what my results will be.
i only know that i will miss all my friends here in mg.
this is the year that i made a lot of good friends, i will be leaving for poly and all of them will just go ACJC.
maybe i should just shut the doors and be dao to all new friends.
the more friends i make in mg, the more i will get hurt when i leave.
it sounds as if i am going to die or leaving for good to somewhere else.
but, putting/ forcing myself into poly away from all my good friends is as good as killing me.
pls tell me that all my good pals out there will stay in touch with me when we graduate from MG.

we are on the same boat that stays insecure from then onwards.